Jennifer
climbs out of the Porsche Cayenne, teetering slightly in cheap bubblegum pink
patent stilettos. She snaps her chewing gum loudly, pulls up her grey skinny
jeans in order to avoid exposing an unsightly bum crack and flicks her long,
blonde hair over her shoulder. Readjusting her gaudy silver boob tube, she looks
back at the other two who are still fiddling around with their sheilas, a
nauseous look on her face.
"Don't
worry, everything's perfect," Moza assures her, following her out of the car,
looking ridiculous even for Dubai standards in her huge Chanel sunglasses... at
nine in the evening. Lady Luxe is next, her face completely covered in an opaque
niqab, with only her eyes peeking through the slits in the cloth. Handing over
the car to the valet outside the imposing yet rather comical hotel, she joins
her cousin in walking up to the entrance, taking a second to look up at the huge
salmon pink building, wondering what the architect was smoking when he conceived
the idea. She hasn't been there since the grand opening party as quite frankly,
she wasn't impressed by the weird, colourful structures and the shoddy
finishing. It is the last place anyone she knows would expect her to grace, and
therefore absolutely perfect for tonight's rendezvous.
"As
fine as a chav can look, you mean?" Jennifer - also known as Rowdha - jokes,
blowing a big bubble with her gum, trying to soothe her static nerves.
"Darling,
you'd put any Sharon or Tracy to shame," Moza says in an over-exaggerated poncy
accent, following her sister into the hotel. "Now, just remember, we'll be right
there the whole time. We'll give you around 15 minutes with him before Exhibit
A, we'll send over Exhibit B ten minutes after that, and then the final showdown
will happen when you give us the go ahead."
"And
remember that he doesn't know a single thing about Jennifer other than the fact
that she's Emirati, she dances like Pussycat Doll and she drives a black
Cayenne," Lady Luxe adds, excitement rippling through her veins. The afternoon's
drama, combined with the knots of anxiety in her stomach and countless sleepless
nights, has suddenly caused an unexpected reaction within. Adrenaline has
replaced the tension, and she feels sharp, strong and in control - much like her
previous scheming self. She is tired of feeling weak, tired of being intimidated
and tired of feeling used. Okay, so she can't do much about Mola at present -
but she can do something about that sneaky
little bastard Humaid. He isn't the only one with contacts at Etisalat, nor is
he the only one with wasta. In fact, she is far higher up in the food chain and
tonight, he would learn the hard way that no one messes with Lady Luxe -
especially not a horny, pubescent Emirati with far too much money and not enough
class.
"Got
it," Rowdha says. "So I can basically say or do whatever I want. Yalla, I'm
ready for this. I'm going down... see you later." She suppresses the urge to leg
it back to the car and walks away, her long, blonde wig swishing behind her and
her heels clattering on the pink marble floors.
Moza
and Lady Luxe sink down on a bench by the colourful statue of a sea amoeba and
say nothing for a moment, absorbed in their thoughts.
"Do
you think this is going to work?" Lady Luxe finally asks, breaking the peaceful
silence. Although she is no longer riddled with fear of having her entire life
exposed, she is still on edge. She is relying on Plan B to solve the Humaid
issue once and for all, and if it does work, then she can go back to
concentrating on bringing Leila down – something she has been dying to do ever
since the annoying, gold digging cow hoisted herself onto a throne.
"Actually,"
Moza replies slowly, "I do. It's obvious what kind of guy Humaid is. He's
two-faced and shallow like the rest of them. By the time we're through with him,
he'll never show his face in Za'abeel again."
"Ameen
to that," Lady Luxe hails, standing up and stumbling slightly, unable to see
properly through the tiny gap in the cloth. How women cover their faces on a
daily basis to hide their beauty is beyond her comprehension. Already she feels
as though she is being smothered. Besides, hiding a face like hers from the
public would be a great pity, she decides. She simply cannot imagine being so
completely anonymous, or not having men constantly admire her. Nor can she
imagine a world where she is a nobody.
"You
should have just worn sunglasses like me," Moza says, looking far more graceful
as she stands up. "They'll be easier to take off later as well."
"I'd
rather be a clumsy munaqqaba than a refined fashion victim," her cousin retorts,
making her way down the long hallway and concentrating on watching where she is
going. She realises that in niqab, she cannot simply look down with her eyes –
doing so results in her vision being obscured by cloth and she actually has to
move her entire head to see her feet. They walk slowly for a couple of metres
before Moza stops in her tracks, causing her cousin to bump into her.
"Watch
it," Lady Luxe complains. "I can't see properly as it is."
"Look,
there they are!" Moza whispers urgently, pulling Lady Luxe behind a glittery
gold column. "In the lounge. Look!"
Lady
Luxe peers around the column and sees Rowdha sitting on the far end of the
glitzy room, facing the entrance. Humaid is sitting opposite her, dressed in the
very same outfit as that afternoon. Bastard, Lady Luxe
thinks again with hatred.
"So
what shall we do?" she whispers, unable to tear her eyes away from the pair,
desperately trying to read Rowdha's impassive facial expressions. "Hide here
until it's time?"
"Well
we can't exactly go in there like this," Moza replies, also trying to see what
is happening between her sister and the two-faced twit. "…we'll stand out like
prossies in a mosque. Let's just wait here."
"Okay,
let me send some text messages," Lady Luxe murmurs, forcing her eyes to look
away, her heart pounding in anticipation. "Almost time for Exhibit A."
*
* *
Rowdha
sits next to Humaid feeling more uncomfortable than she does at her quarterly
smear tests. As much as she enjoys talent spotting and the occasional flirting,
this is the first time in five years that she has left her home in something so
revealing – not to mention tacky. With her post-baby figure, it isn't exactly
flattering either. Even back in her slightly wilder days, her antics were always
conducted in Western countries - never, ever in Dubai. She has never understood
how her cousin could easily plonk a wig on her head and then mess around
practically in her own back garden. That girl had far too much courage. If she
had been more sensible in her choice of venue – and, of course, friends - they
wouldn't have been in this precarious situation.
Her
throat dry and her palms clammy, she fidgets in her seat, pulling up her top to
reveal less of a plunging, mother-of-two cleavage and tries not to make her
awkwardness so obvious.
This
is also her first (and last, she swears) 'date' whilst being married - something
she never dreamt she would do. Although her presence is not voluntary, and nor
is it really a date, she can't help but feel as if she is doing something
terribly wrong. She tries to tell herself that she isn't cheating, but sitting
there at the Atlantis with another man who is trying to let his knee touch hers,
she gets the feeling that her husband wouldn't agree.
"You
look a little different today," Humaid notes, his eyes flickering over Rowdha's
thicker eyebrows, her bigger mouth, her rounder face.
No
kidding, Sherlock, she thinks to herself, suppressing a yawn and trying to
follow the bimbo slut brief she has been given.
"Really?
Well, you did see me in the dark," she giggles, chewing her gum loudly. "But
then, most guys do see me in the dark. I hardly ever go out with guys during the
day. I don't look very pretty in natural light." She says this with such
nonchalance that Humaid actually believes the statement to be true. Weird,
definitely, but true all the same.
"Is
that so?" Humaid leans forwards, unashamedly trying to look down her top. "You
look fine to me."
He
is a little too close for comfort, close enough for Rowdha to smell his spicy
oud and she moves back as much as she can, another wave of guilt rippling
through her. Please God, forgive me for this, she pleads,
taking a sip of her tea.
"So
how come you've taken so long to get back to me?" he asks, his gaze still
fixated on her chest. Rowdha shrinks further into herself, feeling completely
naked. How women walk around wearing next to nothing is beyond her. She makes a
mental note to ask her promiscuous cousin how she brings herself to wear such
skimpy clothing – assuming she gets out of this mess relatively unscathed, that
is.
"You
know how it is. So many guys, so little time," she laughs, discreetly wiping her
palms on her jeans. "I mean, all of last week, I had to like, you know, go out
with this Saudi guy who pays for all my plastic surgery. And then the week
before there was this American guy who took up all my time. This is like,
literally the first free night I've had in
a long time."
"Oh."
For once, Humaid is speechless. Is she a prostitute, he
wonders, partly intrigued, partly repulsed.
"Are
you a -" he begins, his voice rising in indignant excitement.
"No!"
Rowdha laughs, slapping her thighs. "Well, not literally. I don't charge for sex
but I do accept gifts, if you know what I mean." She winks at him, and he feels
his tea rise up his oesophagus. What happened to the classy girl from the club?
After all that time he waited for her to finally yield to his pursuit, he was
expecting a woman with a little more decorum. But then, what did he expect from
a club-whore whose best friend liked to bestow 'favours' on innocent men in dark
alleys?
As
they continue to talk, Rowdha dropping more and more references to previous
'boyfriends', Humaid starts to wonder if this is all a big joke, if Jennifer is
actually trying to put him off. Surely no
woman – prostitute or otherwise – would behave with such indignity in public
unless she had an ulterior motive.
"Leila
told me you're Emirati," he states, narrowing his eyes and looking at her face
for a change. The accusation comes like a drawn gauntlet and Rowdha wonders
whether to admit she is, or to lie a little more.
"Oh
Lord no!" Rowdha exclaims, choosing the latter and guffawing loudly.
"That's
what she said," he protests in defiance, scowling.
"That's
what she thinks," Rowdha replies conspiringly. "Actually,
to be honest, my father is Emirati. My mother is Indian. She was his
housemaid."
"Your
mother was a housemaid?"
"Yes,
but it was a very long time ago. We actually have a history of maids in the
family. My grandmother and great-grandmother were both maids back in India."
"You're
half Indian?"
"So?"
Humaid
leans back in this seat, clearly exhausted by the conversation, finally
beginning to realise that Jennifer isn't worth his time at all. However, after
all those days he spent fantasising about her, along with the pent-up sexual
energy following the meeting with his future wife, he wonders whether to just
screw her and leave her anyway. She is practically a prostitute anyway and
probably won't be too difficult to lure into his car. But there is no way he
will actually pay for her services – with
money or gifts. No, after wasting his
thoughts and his time, she owes him this. And he always makes sure that his
rights are fulfilled.
Rowdha
is also shattered. The story-telling was a little fun after she got over her
initial sense of guilt, but now, it is just plain tiring. She hasn't told so
many stories since her children were small, demanding bedtime tales before going
to sleep, and even that was a chore. She is hoping however, that the plan is
working and Humaid is too disgusted with Jennifer to pursue her further.
"Jennifer!
Darling! How are you?" Rowdha looks up to see a small, Filipino man with high
cheekbones and short, spiky hair stride over to her. He is wearing a bright pink
shirt and tight jeans, and as he comes closer, she notices that the tips of his
hair are ice-blonde.
"Jose!"
she squeals, jumping up from her seat and throwing her arms around him. "Oh my
God, it's been SO long!" She beams at him and playfully ruffles his hair.
"Who's
this?" Humaid asks sharply, a little put out by the interruption. He was just
about to begin enticing Jennifer to accept a ride. Home, that is.
"Humaid,
meet my old friend Jose," Rowdha gushes, still grinning. Despite meeting Jose
for the very first time, she is thrilled to see him and thankful for the
interruption. "Jose, this is Humaid. My boyfriend."
Humaid
almost chokes on his drink.
"Nice
to meet you," he splutters, too shocked at Rowdha's statement to be insulted by
the presence of a khaneeth.
"Jose,
you have to join us," Rowdha declares, pulling his slender arm and forcing him
into the seat beside her.
"Oh,
I don’t know," Jose says, smiling a bright, toothy smile and covering his baby
face with his hands. "I don’t want to impose…."
"You're
not imposing, you have to stay for a
bit."
"Okay,
if you absolutely insist," Jose huffs, sitting down and putting his arm around
Rowdha's shoulders. "So tell me darling,
how are you? As in, how are
you really?"
"I'm
fine," Rowdha says, imploring him with her eyes to be quiet.
"You're
such a strong little thing," he continues with raw emotion, pulling a silk
handkerchief out of his pocket and dabbing the corner of his right eye
delicately.
"It
was just a cold," Rowdha says through clenched teeth, pretending to be annoyed.
She kicks Jose under the table, accidentally-on-purpose kicking Humaid
instead.
"Ouch!"
Humaid exclaims, bending down to rub his sore ankle. "What the hell was that
for?"
"Sorry,
my foot must have slipped," Rowdha says quickly, throwing Jose a quick warning
look, one that does not go amiss by the increasingly suspicious Humaid. "Anyway
Jose, don’t you have somewhere you have to be?" she says, all the warmth in her
voice gone as she stares daggers at him.
"Right.
Yes. I better go. Hope your…..'cold' goes away soon."
Humaid
stares at Jose's retreating back in confusion. Although he is not the sharpest
knife in the kitchen, he is perceptive enough to realise that there is something
going on – something he is not supposed to know. Jennifer is obviously sick, but
is trying to hide it from him. He rubs his swollen ankle again, befuddlement
written all over his otherwise attractive face.
"What's
wrong with you?" he asks, out of curiosity more than genuine concern.
"Nothing!"
Rowdha snaps, folding her arms and looking away.
They
sit in stony silence for a while, Humaid trying to understand exactly what was
going on while Rowdha suppresses the smile that is aching to form on her
scowling lips. The tension is thick enough to slice, and Rowdha is enjoying his
obvious discomfort.
She
opens her mouth to begin talking, but before she can, there is a sudden movement
in the lounge, and she looks up to see a vaguely attractive girl in a plain
black abaya descend upon her table.
"Can
I help you?" Rowdha asks politely.
"Galeelat
al sharaf," the girl hisses in Arabic, hatred clouding her dark eyes.
Man,
this girl is good, Rowdha thinks to herself, looking forward
to seeing what would happen next. "What's your problem? Do I know you?"
"What's
going on?" Humaid intervenes weakly, his head beginning to pound. All he wanted
was to spend time with the sexy, fiery little thing from the club, but the girl
who snatched his hat and danced with him was so different from the one who now
sat opposite him. This girl wasn't fiery, she was rude. She wasn't sexy, she was
annoying. And she definitely wasn't a little thing. In fact, she seemed to be a
lot older than he expected. He sighs, wishing he hadn't wasted so much time on
her, but reluctant to let her go completely without
getting anything in return.
"You
might not know me, but you certainly know my husband don't you?" The girl spits,
bringing her face so close to Rowdha's that she can smell her cigarette breath.
"Don’t try and deny it. I recognise you from the picture he has, you cheap
whore."
"I
don’t know what you're talking about," Rowdha says defiantly, glancing over at
Humaid who is looking shocked all over again.
"Don't
fucking lie to me!" The girl screams in English. The other guests in the lounge
turn around to stare, but the girl either doesn’t notice or doesn’t care. "Don’t
fucking insult me anymore! You gave him herpes you dirty bitch! And now I have
them too!"
There
is a stunned silence while the other guests stare in open-mouthed horror. Rowdha
says nothing, her face turning red. The girl is so convincing that she almost
feels as if she actually does have the disease. Humaid's face turns greens.
"I
hope you rot in hell," the local girl chokes out, her eyes wild with fury. She
turns to leave, and then stops mid-movement. Hesitating slightly, she turns to
spit on Rowdha's lap before striding away, leaving behind an atmosphere of
disgust and embarrassment.
Rowdha
doesn't know whether to laugh or cry. The girl was amazing but here she is,
sitting with a stupid jerk, wearing dodgy clothes, saliva decorating her lap
while the entire lounge ogles her as if she is one of those ugly monkeys with
their bums hanging out in Al Ain Zoo.
"What
the hell," Humaid mutters, his hands shaking. "You
have herpes?"
"Yes,"
Rowdha says in a quiet voice, looking down. "I don’t know how I got it or where
it came from. That's why I didn’t want to meet you. I didn’t want you to get it.
It's so painful and so sore. I have blisters all over my –"
"Okay!
I get it!" Humaid interrupts, bile rising to the back of this throat. To think
he almost…
"I'm
so upset!" Rowdha chokes, her voice beginning to wobble. "I don’t know what to
do!" Before Humaid can respond, she gets up and plants herself on his lap,
wrapping her arms around his neck and sobbing into his chest.
"Get
off me," Humaid mutters in disgust, trying to disentangle himself. The evening
has been nothing like how he expected and he no longer knows what to do. Should
he push her to the floor and leave? Wait for her to stop crying and then
leave?
"What
do we have here?"
The
voice is familiar and Humaid is almost too scared to look up. He has had enough
drama for one evening. His eyes focus on a pair of sparkly sandals, an abaya hem
grazing them gently. With baited breath, he looks up, his eyes moving past the
length of the abaya and up to the girl's face. When he sees who it is, all the
blood leaves his face. The poor, innocent girl he was thinking about marrying
looks at him with undisguised disappointment. Her cousin stands next to her,
disapproval etched all over her face.
"You
should be ashamed of yourself," Moza says, venom lacing her words. Her phone
ready in her hand, she takes a picture of Humaid sitting there with a blonde
bundle on his lap. "I'll be sure to show this to Mohamed's father."
"Wait!
I didn’t do anything! She just – " Humaid struggles to push Rowdha off his lap,
but she clings on even tighter, her body heaving with laughter masquerading as
sobs.
"Goodbye,"
Lady Luxe says softly, before turning on her heels and walking away, Moza close
behind her.
"Sharmuta!"
Humaid yells, pushing Rowdha off his lap. "Look what you did!"
"What
did I do?" she cries in pretend sorrow. "You're the one who's been hounding me
for the last two weeks! I didn’t know that you're married."
"I'm
not! I was…Oh forget it." Humaid gets up, throws a five-hundred dirham note on
the table and walks away without looking back.
Rowdha
waits a few minutes until she is sure that he has disappeared from sight, and
begins to laugh. Half an hour later, she is joined by the rest of the motley
crew - including Jose the Khaneeth and Wafa, the Palestinian 'local' girl. They
all laugh together, replaying the evening's events in detail, so enraptured in
their own little circle that they fail to notice a guest who, whilst walking
past, stops to see where all the laugher is coming from. And when a familiar
face registers in his mind, he stops and stares, unsure whether to be pleased at
what he has learnt... or enraged.
CONVERSATION
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